Letter to My Younger Self

Dear Dyanne

You will get through this and you will see the world another way. I know that, right now, life is confusing. You have convinced yourself that as long as you do what is expected of you that it will unlock all the things that you believe you need to be happy. You think that being pleasing to people and giving more than you have to give will buy the love and affection you desire. You don’t ever fall for bad men, you just fall for men that are bad for you. It can be really confusing. It’s because you have a belief inside you that anyone can do anything that you see his potential instead of who he is at the moment. Maybe, you are really projecting your potential on to him. This is a mistake. It won’t serve you in the long run.

You will spend the next few years of your life losing your way. You are straying from the path trying to please others and follow their rules about life. Define your own. You are the smartest person on the subject of you. The love that you are looking for is in your own body and mind. You are searching for the validation that you are a good human being when the reality is that you already know it.

All those things that you are judging yourself by are illusions. Deep inside, you know that God has high hopes for you. You always seek to make better the life of any person that you encounter. You’ve been told on numerous occasions that you know everything and can do anything. So, why don’t you believe it? It’s scary to step into your purpose and be who you are without question or doubt. It’s easier to distract yourself with problems and to accept criticisms to keep you small. You’ve allowed people to write their fears, judgments and project their doubts onto you. It has affected your self-esteem, but not your value. There is still apart of you that feels like the world should be yours to enjoy. You need to dim the other voices and let that smaller voice rise and fill you until you believe it. That voice speaks your truth.

The reality, my love, is that you are keeping yourself lonely. Being misunderstood is much lonelier than actually being alone. When God created Eve, he meant for her to be adored by her man and loved as he would love himself. The reason why they share a rib is so that Adam would see his woman as he sees himself. She is an expression of God’s love.  You try to get him to love himself, but, in doing that, you are missing out on being loved because if he can’t love himself there is no way that he can love an extension of himself. Instead you should find a man that understands how to love himself and who sees you as his cup running over rather than trying to get you to fill it up.

Dearest, your cup is running over. If you really saw how many blessing flow from you, you would know that it was more like a waterfall. If you can change your view of life, you will know this. Don’t see what you don’t have. See what you could have if you believed in the power, the beauty and the heart of you. You have always trusted yourself that you can handle anything. Instead of handling, start to believe that you can create anything. God wants your happiness. He wants you to have a man who can demonstrate his love. He wants you to pursue the purpose He created you for. Who are you to tell God that He is wrong? Be the love in this world that you were created to be.

Sincerely,

Your older self.