Where is the “No” Inside of You?

Everybody hates haters, right? It’s like having a war to achieve peace. You hate the person that constantly hates on your dreams and tells you what you can’t do. It can be frustrating to deal with a person that looks at the negative side of everything. But, if someone is saying something about you that you didn’t believe was true, you would simply ignore them. So, why can a hater make you angry at their constant negativity?

I’ve said in the past that the people you attract into your life serve a purpose. The people that surround us are a reflection of our inner world, which is why they say if you want to know something about someone look at his friends. If you have a hater, that person is mirroring the negative things you believe about yourself. The comments that hurt the most are the ones that you silently believe about yourself.

For example, you have a friend that constantly tells you that you can’t start a business. There has to be a small “no” inside you that is telling you that you can’t start a business, otherwise, you wouldn’t be bothered by that comment. You wouldn’t take it personally or react angrily unless it touched a place inside of you.

But, this doesn’t mean that you should keep a hater in your life. Anyone that is spewing negativity on a constant basis isn’t a healthy relationship to keep. What I am telling you is that you should view the comments of this person as a reason to look inside of yourself? When someone makes a comment and you feel like you’ve been hit with a bullet, search for the wound and stop the bleeding. What do you think about yourself that made that comment feel true?

If you can deal with yourself instead of getting angry with the hater, eventually the things that the hater says will seem silly because you won’t be personally connected to them. At that point, you will do one of two things. You will either stop spending time with the person that is spewing negativity because it feels better to be positive or you counter the comments of the negative person. People who want to be negative can’t stand when people are positive.

The bottom-line truth is that if you want to be stopped you will surround yourself with people who are hell-bent on stopping you. If you want to succeed, you should surround yourself with people who are pushing you towards success. When you start to focus on your possibilities, you will attract or seek out a motivator. A motivator tells you the truth and challenges you, but does it with your best interest at heart. Their intention is to see you succeed instead of tearing you down.

The people in your life are there because you want them there. Your job is to figure out why you want them there and to use them as the reflections they are in your life. View your inner world through your outer reflections.

“Hate is too great a burden to bear. It injures the hater more than it injures the hated.”- Coretta Scott King

“To hate everything is to be wounded by everything.” ― Marty Rubin

We are our harshest critics. Can you find the “no” inside of you? Share in comments.