Last night, I watched a movie called, “The Vow” starring Channing Tatum and Rachel McAdams. If you don’t know the premise of the movie, it’s based on the true story of Kim and Krickitt Carpenter. A young married couple, Leo (Tatum) and Paige (McAdams), go out for an evening and end up in a life altering accident. The wife, Paige, suffers a brain injury and can only remember her life before her husband, Leo. In fact, she remembers being engaged to someone else. The movie follows the time after her injury as they try to adjust to a life where Leo is basically a stranger and Paige remembers only her life without him.
This movie made me think about love and how far would you go for love. As I watched the interaction between the characters, my heart ached for both. I could imagine Leo’s sadness and frustration that his wife remembered everyone, but him. You would have to question how much love was between you if you were completely erased. I could also understand Paige’s frustration in having a piece of her life erased. She had changed so much in the time before and with her husband that she barely recognized herself. But, the beautiful thing is that Leo kept trying to get his wife back. It’s the type of love that we all hope and wish for.
“I vow to fiercely love you in all your forms, now and forever. I promise to never forget that this is a once in a lifetime love.”- Leo
As I watched the movie, I thought about whether I could selflessly pursue someone who, not only rejected me, but treated me as if I was a stranger. Would I have the strength to try to continue to pursue someone and prove to them that I am the person they should be in love with? But, how many of us are doing it without even realizing it? Granted, our stories are not as devastating or dramatic, but many of us have been involved in the struggle of proving our worthiness to be loved to someone else. It might be family members or it may be lovers. In the movie, Leo was up against incredible odds. But, nothing changed until Paige was interested in trying to find love with him as well. Love is a choice. You have to choose it every day.
These two characters had every reason to walk away and no one would fault them, because they were up against immense odds. But, if only one person was trying, it would’ve been impossible. You can fight when someone is fighting along with you. However, if you are the only one fighting and trying then may have to walk away. You are worthy of love and each of us have the potential to have epic love. It’s not about someone showing up and creating magical love. It’s about making a choice. If both people in the relationship choose to be the magical, epic love in each others lives, it can happen. If you can be fiercely committed and kind to your partner, it can happen. If you can be everything to your partner that you hope to find in the world, it can happen. You both have to want it and choose it. And, like Leo and Paige, you also have an opportunity to make them fall in love with you over and over again.
“I vow to help you love life, to always hold you with tenderness and to have the patience that love demands, to speak when words are needed and to share the silence when they are not and to live within the warmth of your heart and always call it home.”- Paige