“When you struggle with your partner, you are struggling with yourself. Every fault you see in them touches a denied weakness in yourself.”― Deepak Chopra
The relationship with your partner is attracted into your life to help you work out and deal with your own wounds. Your partner is a reflection of you. It is easier to point the finger at your partner and be mad at the things they do rather than to look at yourself and know that you need to repair something. But, what disturbs you about your partner is something that you have denied about yourself. The partner will bring up your wounds.
If you abandon yourself emotionally, you will find yourself with someone who discounts your emotions. If you are financially insecure, you will attract someone who can’t respect their own financial needs. Whatever you are not giving to yourself is who you will find in a partner. It’s the Universe’s way of bringing that lesson to your attention. It’s the lesson you have to learn. If you don’t trust yourself, you may be involved with someone who cheats.
While your partner is not responsible for all that you feel, your urge may be to fix them and focus on their issues instead of your own. The reality is that you will continue to attract the same type of partner until you heal the weakness within you. That person is in your life for the benefit of your healing. Does that mean that you should stay with someone who is abusing, cheating or lying to you? No, and if someone is abusing you, whether physically or emotionally, you should not subject yourself to that. I want you to understand that you were attracted to that type of person because there is something within you that you need to heal. No relationship is by chance. Every relationship is a mirror by which you see your own reflection.
Instead of blaming the other person, you should use it as an opportunity to figure out why you find yourself in that relationship? What are you supposed to learn from it? What disgusts you in another person is something that you need to deal with in yourself, otherwise, it wouldn’t bother you. If you want to change anyone, you should always start with yourself. What you allow in a relationship is what you haven’t healed within yourself.